When we ask ourselves what are the negative effects of adoption, I'm guessing most of us think of abuse and neglect. We know that there are homes where children's needs are not met, where parents are not able to make the changes they need to in order to provide for their children, and/or where … [Read more...] about HOW ADOPTION AFFECTS CHILD DEVELOPMENT (EVEN IF THEY’VE BEEN IN CARE FROM BIRTH)?
Parenting an Adopted Child
Parenting an adopted child is HARD WORK. You need fresh ideas and inspiration when the strategies employed by friends with their birth children simply don't work.
Here are some ideas, resources and general empathy/encouragement from a mama who struggles too.
As an adoptive parent - and, you know, reasonably sensible, logical human being - I'm a big fan of natural consequences when it comes to behaviour management. This is simply allowing your child to reap the consequences of the action they've taken, with no/little additional input from you. You … [Read more...] about WHEN NATURAL CONSEQUENCES DON’T WORK (THREE EXAMPLES)
I never formulated my ideas about Santa because of our adopted children, in case any of you think I'm more thoughtful about these kinds of things than I actually am. As a child, I enjoyed writing to Santa, sending my letter up the chimney of our open fire by making a draught with the door (a … [Read more...] about WHAT WE TEACH OUR ADOPTED CHILDREN ABOUT SANTA
Last year, I wrote an article for Home for Good on how our churches can support single adopters and foster carers. It was generally well-received, but one commenter asked - and I'm pleased he did - whether adoption was something we should be encouraging for the single brothers and sisters in our … [Read more...] about SHOULD SINGLE CHRISTIANS ADOPT?
In all the stories I've shared so far this week (click here to start with the first), home education is done as a family, for all children in the home. But what happens when just one of your children is struggling with mainstream school, and the others are coping well? Becky tells us … [Read more...] about SHOULD I HOME EDUCATE? 5: THE INDIVIDUALISED HOME EDUCATOR
We've heard the story of Lizzie, who chose home education despite having worked in schools, and yesterday we heard Jenny's story of being converted to home education, having had her older four kids educated privately. But the question of 'Should I home educate?' takes on a new meaning when your … [Read more...] about SHOULD I HOME EDUCATE? 3: THE HOPEFUL HOME EDUCATOR
Our adopted boys have been with us over three years, yet I'd never properly come across the idea of 'therapeutic parenting' until two years in. As we've become more familiar with this approach, we've started to ask ourselves what does the Bible say about therapeutic parenting? Is therapeutic … [Read more...] about WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY ABOUT THERAPEUTIC PARENTING?
Blink, and three years will pass in an instant. I mean, while you know and I know that it's only actually been three minutes since our gorgeous 14-month-old boys moved into our family, the calendar (damn that thing - is it even a trustworthy article?) suggests it's actually been nearly three … [Read more...] about CHOOSING A SCHOOL FOR AN ADOPTED CHILD (5 QUESTIONS TO ASK)
The adoption process involves several home visits. Your social worker doesn't need to see a show home (thank flippin' goodness for that) – but they do need to see that you have the space for a new child/ren, that you're able to keep the home clean and tidy enough to nurture human life, and that … [Read more...] about ADOPTION AND VICARAGES: HOW DO I KEEP CHILDREN SAFE IN A ‘PUBLIC’ FAMILY SPACE?