Parenting a child with attachment disorder is challenging work. If you're in the trenches right now, please know that you're not alone. I myself am an adoptive parent, and know what it's like to feel at your wits' end. My twins are 5 and a huge blessing to our family - but when their attachment … [Read more...] about AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT IN CHILDREN: THE WHAT, WHY AND HOW
Here are some articles and resources to support you as you consider adoption and move through the process.
Parenting any child who has attachment disorder is tough - as the adoptive parent of twin boys, I know this only too well. If you're up against it right now, I bring tidings of great joy: YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I find this tough, you find this tough, and thousands of others are finding it tough all … [Read more...] about THE AMBIVALENT ATTACHMENT CHILD: WHAT, WHY AND HOW?
Friend, if you've stumbled upon this site because you're tearing your hair out over your child's behaviour and attitude, and wondering if attachment difficulties might be at the heart of it all, welcome. You are not alone - I'm an adoptive mum, and battle attachment difficulties every day with my … [Read more...] about UNDERSTANDING DISORGANIZED ATTACHMENT IN YOUR CHILD: WHAT, WHY AND HOW?
Even though I've been an adoptive parent for several years, the various different types of attachment styles in children still confuse me. It's a complicated area of psychology for sure - but in case we weren't perplexed enough, it turns out that different professionals use different words for … [Read more...] about THE FOUR TYPES OF ATTACHMENT STYLES EXPLAINED
Some years ago, before adoption was even really on the cards for us, and when our eldest was just one, a friend made a passing comment that she wouldn't consider adoption because she had several birth children and had read about the damaging impact of adoption on biological kids. I honestly … [Read more...] about IS ADOPTION SCREWING UP MY BIRTH KIDS? (ON MIXING BIOLOGICAL AND ADOPTED CHILDREN)
Is anyone else scrabbling about, the day before Fathers' Day, trying to think of a suitable gift for their kids' dad? Or is it just me? DesertDad is incredibly difficult to buy for. He doesn't really want anything, bar a decent whisky, and then I'm caught between whether it's appropriate for … [Read more...] about A FATHER’S ROAD TO ADOPTION
The adoption process involves several home visits. Your social worker doesn't need to see a show home (thank flippin' goodness for that) – but they do need to see that you have the space for a new child/ren, that you're able to keep the home clean and tidy enough to nurture human life, and that … [Read more...] about ADOPTION AND VICARAGES: HOW DO I KEEP CHILDREN SAFE IN A ‘PUBLIC’ FAMILY SPACE?
It's one of those questions that many of us might have in our heads, but never actually verbalise. After all, it sounds rude, doesn't it? As if we're questioning someone's life choices - something we know never, ever to do in 21st-century Britain. Well, here's an answer. It's my answer, and it may … [Read more...] about WHY ADOPT WHEN YOU CAN HAVE BIRTH CHILDREN?
I wrote the following nearly two years ago, on the occasion of our twins' first birthday. Today, our twins turn one. I haven't yet met them, but I love them already. We need to celebrate - and yet how does one celebrate the birthday of someone they've never met? Someone who is already so firmly … [Read more...] about THE UN-BIRTHDAY: CELEBRATING THE BIRTHDAY OF THE CHILD YOU HAVEN’T MET