Duties of Parents

There’s a lot to really appreciate about ‘Duties of Parents’.

Firstly, it’s short – and don’t pretend that’s not a huge plus for any reader, not least a busy parent.

Secondly, it’s fascinating to read the words of J.C. Ryle – a nineteenth-century bishop, preacher, husband and father of five – and be reminded that the foundations of healthy gospel-centred parenting haven’t changed.

Thirdly, editor Alan Witchalls warmly welcomes us in, inviting us not necessarily to agree with everything Ryle says, but also not to throw it out as being out-of-date or traditional. He’s right: there is plenty to treasure in Ryle’s words, and plenty I found myself challenged on. Am I prioritising a knowledge and study of the bible in my family? Have I taught my children to pray? How well do I nurture godly character in their hearts?

Where Ryle’s teachings and my own parenting beliefs part company is in the later chapters, which largely seem to be based on the premise that the parent is always right, must always be obeyed, and is the God-like authority in the household. For a child in an abusive or neglectful home this is certainly not true – but none of us parents are perfect. And I believe that it is in fact the acknowledgement of our own faults and failings in sincere apology to our children, more than forced obedience to petty rules, that has the power to turn their hearts towards the only perfect parent: God himself.

Overall, a really interesting read. Short, pithy chapters with much to ponder, aided by Witchalls’ carefully-crafted reflection questions. This would make an interesting book club read for a group of Christian parents.